Tuesday 29 November 2011

Bear's Day

There's so much to say, and yet it doesn't really need to be said. He would have been one today, our boy. We baked him a cake to mark the occasion. A year is such a strange amount of time. So long in theory, but then it hurtles past you and suddenly we are back here, twelve months on from when he was born.
It's been a heavy week. We didn't know how we'd feel. We've been restless at night and grouchy during the day. Not ideal, but to be expected, I suppose.
The light has come from the bond between us. Strong, resolute, unbreakable, it has got us through 365 days of unchartered, choppy, scary, painful waters. Love is an amazing thing.
Family and friends have played their part too. Thank you everyone, everyone who has ever left a reassuring comment. Friends from childhood, new friends, ones who truly understand, others who don't but you try so hard anyway. We are lucky to have parents who bouy us along, and siblings who care. Bear was born into a wonderful, amazing, inspiring collection of loved ones. If only, he'd known.
We love our son and ache for his life, which was snatched away at such a tragic time. He has changed us, his beautiful faces still looks back at ours from cherished photographs around our home. The outcome - his terribly short life - will never feel just. But we still made that gorgeous boy. And we found some strength today to celebrate that.

15 comments:

  1. he certainly made an impact m.b. xx

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  2. He's a beautiful boy. Happy birthday Bear.

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  3. Happy Birthday Bear. Thinking of you...

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  4. Well done to both you and Toby for getting through a year of all those difficult firsts, without your lovely little Bear. I hope the future is kinder and gentler to you all.

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  5. Happy birthday little Bear. I'm sorry he's not here with you. I have an extra candle burning for him and you tonight, alongside Joseph's.
    A year away from our boys is just too hard to fathom. Love and light to you. xxx

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  6. With love to you all and a special hug for Bear, conceived in love,born in love,a testament to your love x

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  7. Happy Birthday Bear - thinking of you little man sending you and your Mummy & Daddy and baby sister much love on your special day love Angela O xxx

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  8. You're so strong and inspirational Alice. I love the idea of baking your little boy a birthday cake! I hope I can do our Angel something as lovely when his day comes round.
    Happy Birthday little Bear. Your mummy & Daddy must make you so proud.
    Hugs to you all xx

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  9. Belated birthday greetings to Bear. Good to see the Times putting a prominent link to todays article on front page of their web edition. You have done a great job to raise necessary awareness and shared more of yourself in the process than you probably would have liked - sharing your most personal of tragedies takes real guts. Bear came from strong stock

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  10. It was so strange to me when my daughter's first birthday came around. She was stillborn at fullterm on March 16, 2010. Lily Katherine is her beautiful name. So many emotions fill the day. I couldn't bare to think that she had been gone longer than she had ever been alive. I am sorry for your loss. I'd love to have you follow along on my blog as well: www.roseandherlily.blogspot.com

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  11. It's almost the 29th and I just wanted to say Happy Day to Bear.

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  12. Does anyone know if everything went well for Alice with her new baby? I have been thinking of her and wondering and hoping, hoping, praying. K

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  13. Reading this post brought tears to my eyes. Im so sorry for your lost. I lost my daughter sept 2nd, 2011 due to doctors not delivering her in time. I don't know exactly how I will feel when her first birthday comes around. I miss her everyday. Thank you for sharing your touching story.

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  14. tomorrow is the one year anniversary of my baby Gabriel being stillborn. Such a strange feeling, trying to be positive yet sad of course at the memories the day will bring. Pregnant at 36 weeks at the moment with baby due soon so feels even more poignant. kind thoughts to all the families who go through the same as we unfortunately have.

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