Tuesday, 18 January 2011

A tug of war

I suppose what I feel today, and last night, and maybe latently for a few days now, is that people do have to get back to their old lives and we have to carry this torch forward ourselves.
In a way, it is rather nice.
Peace, time together, we've certainly realised that our love has deepened to the kind of unified, aching level that I didn't know was possible. So Toby and I are good, in one sense at least. Better than good, amazing, off the scale, totally and utterly meshed together in understanding.
But we are lonely too. Lonely together, if that is possible. We don't want to be out with friends, but then we don't want to not be out with friends. It is difficult. We know they will be there for us when we emerge from the chrysalis. But will things have changed? They can't not have, can they? It is a worry...

1 comment:

  1. Oh, I know this feeling so well. This has brought my hubby and I even closer than before, but we're like a lonely little island. It's such a relief when we find a person who really understands, but they are few and far between...